Sunday, November 20, 2016

Strike a match (Spinning Profile & Playlist)

I had such a great time using my Election Day ride, I felt it was a shame to not use the profile for another 4 years.

Here's essentially the same profile with new music and 1 extra hill climb.

It wasn't at all intentional that I had music selected that made reference to fire until I went to put this post up; "Highway to Hell", "Accelerant", "Lucky Strike", and "Fireproof".

On an entirely personal note, I have signed up to do my second Ironman70.3 event with the goal of knocking 65 minutes off my time.  While that sounds like a lot, it really isn't when I did as poor as I did.  I went into the event apprehensive about the swim, which I finished in 65 minutes, and then my hip flexor injury kicked up at mile 8 on the run slowing me to a snails pace.  My goal is to get under 7 hours.  It's good to have stated, and printed goals...they help to hold you accountable.


Sunday, November 6, 2016

Election Day Crazy

This election cycle can't be over soon enough for me; and this is from a guy that LOVES politics.

My issue with this particular election cycle is the polarization of people that under normal circumstances can hold intelligent, well thought out conversations, that suddenly feel it's okay to shout down opposing views and opinions.

My solution...ENDORPHINS!

I teach on Tuesday's which means I'm there right as the polls are ready to close on Tuesday night.  So here's my homage to the craziness.

Side Note:  I wanted to put Pink Floyd's - Another Brick In The Wall in this play list since there was a lot of discussion about that during this cycle, but I just couldn't find the right way to put it into the profile so here's the video anyway.

Enjoy and remember that Wednesday morning, we're all still people and we should be civil towards each other; and those that are just plain suck.

God Bless,



Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Tour de France - Stage 20 Megève / Morzine-Avoriaz (Spinning Profile & Playlist)

Every year I pick a segment on the TDF to profile a new Race Day Energy Zone ride; and this year I picked Stage 20 just because I like the diversity of the terrain.

Living in Ohio, I bike enough flat stretches so I have to use the simulated mountains on my Spinning® bike to remind me of home in Appalachia.

A couple of reminders about RDEZ rides:

  • Minimum cadence is 80 rpm
  • Heart rate zone 4 & 5 for the entire "race"
What this means is that you have to be careful to not load your mountains as steep as you would during a strength ride because your cadence is going to be up to 33% faster.  Out in the real world this translates to changing to smaller gears for climbing.

Today's profile has 2 warm up songs with the first just to get the legs warmed up, and the 2nd one to get the core warmed up, go over the positions and proper loading techniques since chances are pretty high they're not used to loading for this type of ride.

Song #3 was the opening music from Knight Rider so you'll either need to find a way to download music from YouTube or substitute another song.

Some of my cues in this profile will say (Power Turns).  Remember this ride isn't just about doing a specific position, it's about a guided journey, visualization.  Just like the hill climbs with switchbacks you'll also have switchbacks coming down the hill.  Now you wouldn't really do this if you were in the alps (mostly for fear 
of driving on the planet), but I want you
to imagine as you're going down hill that the turns are steeply banked and you can power into the turns; adding resistance and keep pedaling at that high cadence.  Once you're out of the turn, decrease your resistance and continue. 

You can add as many or as few of these downhill switchbacks as you feel the mountain gives you.

Preclass I played an edited version of this YouTube preview of Stage 20 so that my class participants could "see" what we were about to undertake to aid them in their visualization.

Remember Race Day is about the energy in the room as much as it is about the profile, so anything you can do to elevate the excitement will make the class more interesting.

~ Spinning Freak™

This link will actually take you to two different profiles lists; the profiles are the same but they have slightly different music depending on your preference.  Enjoy!

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Welcome to Wonderland (Spinning® Profile & Playlist)

Wonderland is a play on words for me...that's what I call it when you step on a scale and the first number is a 1.  In truth, weight is just a number and not an accurate measure of fitness or health.  If you're 6' - 3" you're probably close if not over that 200 number or even if you're a pole.  That is NOT the case for me, at my 5' - 9.5"stature; not that I was in bad shape, but I'm certainly not what I was when I was martial arts fighting.  I always said that if I had worked out like this in my 20's instead of my 40's, I would have been ripped. Alas, my late 20's exercise program was limited to watching figure skating with my wife on the couch and NFL on Sunday (if Pittsburgh was playing.)

Last fall I decided to step up my triathlon endeavors and registered for my first Ironman 70.3 - For those unfamiliar, it's also called a Half Ironman; and No you cannot call yourself an Ironman unless you do the full 140.6 version of this race, in my opinion.  That would be akin to running 8 different 5K races and calling saying you've run a marathon; but I digress.

Starting in January 2016, I concentrated on my eating habits (you can't out work your eating), upped my workouts to 5-7 workouts a week, and 9 months later I had dropped the 20 pounds to put me in Wonderland.  All that to say, it's hard work, but if you set yourself a goal AND make a plan to
 achieve the goal then it can be done.

Oh, and I did finish my first Ironman 70.3 this year, and I look forward to doing several more.  My next major goal is a full Ironman by age 50 (age, just like weight, is just a number).

Welcome to Wonderland Profile is a STRENGTH ENERGY ZONE ride.  Remember not to lose your breath, or you're working out in the wrong energy zone.

Unless you've participated in my class you may be confused by a couple of the instructions so let me explain them, and maybe these will bring something new to your participants without making up some crap like you see in some of these boutique studios.

Incline Gets Steeper and Steeper (switchbacks)
This is like switchbacks that I've coached for quite some time, but instead to always coming back to the base line hill resistance, you return with slightly more than you started with.  Think of it like this, you're going up a 5% hill, you come to turn that makes it really steep while you make the turn, when the road straightens out you're now on a 7% hill, etc...

I cue this by telling my participants think of increasing twice for the switchback and then decreasing once for the straight away.  Up 2 - Down 1.  Do this repeatedly and your hill turns into a mountain.

Rolling Hills
If you've ever gotten to ride on "rollers" on the road, you know that some of the shorter and steeper ones you actually stand and run up the hill.  Same goes in the Spinning studio.  Go with how the music feels.  Do you want the hill longer and more gradual (1 min) or shorter and steeper (30seconds)?



Monday, July 11, 2016

You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet (Spinning Profile & Playlist)

Take my classes long enough and you'll eventually hear me say, "Run like you stole something."  The implication being that someone is hunting you down and you better run (pedal) faster.  I sometimes drop that line when you're spent and we still have sprints at the end of the ride - like this profile.

My latest playlist and profile is chuck full of a wide variety of songs so regardless of your audience there has to be something in there for just about everyone; unless of course you're like the folks in the Blue Brother's movie that believed there were only two types of music.

A couple of things about the cues for this profile:

Rollers (Segment #6, #9)

>> StFlat/Run <
Increase resistance to either a standing Flat or Run, and then drop the resistance as you go down the incline. Repeat as you like.
>> Climb/StFlat/Run << Flat 
Increase resistance to either a seated climb, or a bit extra to a standing Flat or Run, and then drop the resistance as you go down the incline. Repeat as you like.
Think of these as very short rollers so you'll want to cue the class to push hard up the incline so they don't lose momentum.  The resistance loading changes are not dramatic here.  Participants can go from light to medium and stay in the saddle, or light to medium-heavy and run up the incline.  Think of this like the kiddy-coaster you see at the state fair instead of the ride-o-death at the amusement park.

Incline To Hill (Segment #11)

Climb :40 >> Climb :30 < (switchback )

I really like this combination but it may be a little confusing to cue at first.  First for your understanding, you're heading up a hill with switchbacks.  Each straight away is a bit steeper than the previous straightway as you go up the hill.  So with each switchback you increase a lot, and then when your done with the switchback you decrease but not as much as you loaded.  I cue this like two steps up and one step back.  With each switchback your hill becomes steeper and steeper. Repeat as you like.
I hope you enjoy this profile and playlist.  I'd love to hear what your take aways are from it.  And if you're out riding on the roads this summer, be careful.


Spotify Users:  The version of Dannic's BLAZE is shorter on Spotify, so you'll need to adjust the start/stop times for your Sprints.

iTunes Users:  If you don't see an iTunes playlist above, disable your ad blocker for this site.  I have no external advertisements on my site except iTunes playlists.

Saturday, June 11, 2016

Top 5 Tips for New Spinning® Instructors

In a world that loves lists, I thought I'd contribute by providing the Top 5 Tips that were given to me when I first became a Spinning® instructor.  I'm sure that when the individuals that gave me this advice they weren't even thinking about the lasting impact it might have on me, and in turn on the 100's of people that I've instructed over the years, and maybe even the few folks that follow my blog and Facebook.

I'm sure you have your own favorite tips, so please add them to the comments section of this post and see if we can help a budding instructor.

"You'll get tired of your music
before everyone else."

 Raquel Rezara Schmidt, Spinning M.I.

A common question that pops up in Facebook groups, blogs, and just about anytime more than 2 instructors get together is, "How often do you change your play lists?"  The fact of the matter is that unless you dominate a time slot, or participants only come to your class then participants are likely hearing a variety of play lists.  One word of caution, is that if you only use Top 40 music then participants are likely hearing those songs every 30-90 minutes on the radio too.

"Stop making shit up."
Ellen, Star3 - Spinning Instructor

This was probably my most favorite piece of advice because she was so sincere.  Ellen was my first Group X coordinator and I did my first audition with her.  Having participated in a variety of classes prior to becoming certified, I had picked up on a completely legal routine of movements, that I still use today for core warm up.  The issue was that the instructor I picked that up from called it "Around the World", which is exactly how I cued it.  The audition went fine and I got the job, but Ellen's words resonated with me, and that term died that day.

"Fake it 'til you make it."
Heather (Pilate's / Yoga Instructor)

Still a great friend today, Heather recommended that I,
 "Fake it [confidence] 'til [I] make it" with my confidence.  She wasn't talking about faking the class profile, movements, or instructions, simply my personal presentation.

All of this reminds me of the old Dry Idea commercials saying to Never Let Them See You Sweat.  Hiding the buckets of sweat I produce is not an option, but the nerves is.

"Keep it Real."
Jennifer Sage, ICA M.I.

Three little words changed my cuing and ultimately lead me to another new hobby, Outdoor Cycling. I had started researching real cycling to bring that into my class for my first Race Day ride, and that's when I started to learn what things like Pace lines, Switchbacks, and Rollers were.  Now if you participate in one of my classes, you'll hear these terms all the time.  I wasn't making stuff up.  I was still using the core movements that we all learn during certification class, but now I knew how that related to the "real" world.

A special thanks to someone that was visiting my blog that challenged learned about all the real world terms without ever leaving the studio.  An outdoor cyclist that followed my blog at the time didn't even realize that I didn't own a bike.  I wish I could credit him, but I don't remember his name, but thanks Mr. Anonymous, I love cycling now.

"Get off the Bike."  
Ellen, Star3 - Spinning Instructor

Yet, another thing that I have to attribute to a great mentor.  Ellen charged all the instructors that worked for her with getting off the bike to force us to connect with the participants.  Many of the instructors never really got comfortable with this, getting off the bike fist bumping participants and retreating to the safety of their bike as soon as possible, but I still get off the bike and make the rounds.  This skill has served me well multiple times as I was successfully able to coach off the bike when I injured with a broken leg, and then again a couple of years later with broken ribs.

To all this advice I offer the one piece that I give all new instructors...

"Don't Puke! Slow Down to Enjoy the Ride" 
Spinning Freak™

No I'm not actually talking about a hurling your lunch, but that too, I would strongly encourage you to avoid.  New instructors have so much they want to share that they've learned during their certification class.  They're full of excitement, nerves and adrenaline and they want to try to put all that knowledge and enthusiasm in their very first class.  If you do this, you'll literally be talking (and puking up all that knowledge) the entire class.  Slow down.

If you're good, and I'm sure you will be, save something for the 2nd, 3rd, 4th and classes beyond. Don't try to be clever and combine too many moves, too much information, too much talking in each and every profile.  That will come later and naturally to you as you become more comfortable at the front of the room,

Thursday, June 9, 2016

33 Indoor Cycling Class Questions-Real Answers (Article)

I remember when the now iconic Wendy's commercial "Where's the Beef?" first was aired.  These 3 simple words made my father chuckle so hard.  I loved the commercial not because I thought it was particularly funny or cleaver, but for the automatic reaction my dad had from it.  The marketing concept was brilliant in it's simplicity, point out that your competition sucks because they're not really delivering on what you ordered.

Which brings me to an "article" that has recently been floating around the social media sites titled, "33 Indoor Cycling Class Questions - Answered in 5 Words or Less".  They did answer their 32 (yes I said 32) questions in 5 words, but the result may leave you hungry for more information.

Yes, I understand that they thought they were being cleaver with the 5 words or less answers, but sometimes a little information is more dangerous than none at all.  Let's dig into their questions and provide you some "beefy" answers, and while I'll be brief, I won't hold myself to that 5 useless words or less standard.

  1. What is "Spinning®"?
    Spinning is the original indoor cycling program, and yes it's trademarked by Mad Dogg Athletics.  To be a Spinning facility all the bikes have to be Spinner brands and all the instructors have to get and maintain the appropriate certifications.
  2. What's the difference between Spinning and indoor cycling?
    Spinning is a brand of indoor cycling.  There are also many other reputable brands that certify instructors and provide auxiliary support with education and marketing materials.   Like wise, there are a whole host of indoor cycling programs that have none of this backing.  Think of the brands like a Wendy's or McDonald's, big multi-location access to the same program, while all the unbranded stuff is like a one-off burger joint, we'll call Bob's Burgers or Jim's Burgers.  Bob may make a damn good burger, while Jim's Burger's  might have to wonder if it's actually meat. The program, the education, the certification assures you a certain level of consistency.
  3. Is it hard?
    It's exercise and it's meant to make you more fit.  You could go to class and not put on any resistance and when you leave you'll say, "Heck that was an easy class", and while you'd be right, you're also going to get the results that you've earned.
  4. What makes it such a good workout?
    It's a low-impact (not hard on your joints) cardio workout.  The group environment can present a fun and challenging workout.  Additionally, you have control of your resistance so you can establish how hard you work, independent of everyone else.
  5. What makes indoor cycling fun?
    The music helps, but your attitude is the single most important factor.  Come to class with a crappy attitude and you'll have a crappy workout.  If you can bring the positive attitude you'll soon be flushed with the endorphins of a great cardio workout. Presto! Fun!

  6. How long is a class?
    Anywhere from 30 minutes to 60 minutes generally.
  7. Will I lose weight?
    You should, but you can't out work your diet.  Often people think they've burned way more calories than they actually do and then mistakenly over eat.  Women generally burn 400-650 calories, and men usually 500-850 calories per 60 minute class.  So if you justify your nightly pint of Ben & Jerry's Phish Food because you took a Spinning class, you're gonna be disappointed. there are 4 servings in that pint.
  8. What should I eat or drink after class?
    Water, you're most certainly dehydrated.  Many will swear by chocolate milk but remember you're drinking in the calories; as far as eating, if you want to lose weight make sure you don't increase your calorie intake simply as the result of taking a class.
  9. How many calories will I burn in a typical indoor cycling class?
    Look at answer #7.
  10. Will I gain muscle?
    You'll have the exact same number of muscles as when you started, but with consistency and diet those muscles will change to leaner, stronger muscles, especially in the legs.  IT WILL NOT MAKE YOUR LEGS BIG.  This is not a body building type of exercise where you'll get bulging quads but instead everything will tone and shape.  And no, it's not total body, you'll need to find other classes, routines or exercises to work on your core and upper body.
  11. Will I be sore?
    Any new exercise routine will make you a little sore.  I always encourage new participants to take a cold shower on their lower half to help alleviate the microtrauma to your muscles that will show up the next day as muscle soreness.
  12. Do you get breaks?
    It depends on the ride profile, there might be active recovery portions, but other than that you get one AFTER class.
  13. What if I'm hitting a wall?
    Move to a different bike or move your bike away from the wall.  If you're tired during class, and simply need a break, lighten up the resistance and pedal lightly around 80rpm until you're ready to rejoin the class.  Don't simply stop, it makes it hard to restart, and causes a negative cardio reaction of cooling down.
  14. Is it endurance or muscle training?
    I don't know who would ask this question.  It's cardio exercise that can take you from a low zone 2 to a high zone 5 workout.  And yes you'll be using your muscles during class.
  15. you use weights on the bike?
    Do you remember question #2 where I explained the differences between branded and non-branded programs?  None of the credible indoor cycling programs use weights.  There are some "franchised groups" that do, but they are self-certified and not recognized by their peers.  Save the weights for off the bike so you don't get hurt.
  16. What does 'in the saddle' mean?
    The saddle refers to the bike seat; "in the saddle" means while you're seated.
  17. And 'out of the saddle'?
    As you can probably figure out, it means in a standing position.
  18. What should I wear?
    Whatever makes you feel comfortable. I have two suggestions, avoid long pant legs so as to avoid getting wrapped up in the pedal.  The second is good running shoes; when you're standing on the bike pedals you'll want extra support for your foot.
  19. What if I don't know how to set up my bike?
    Ask the instructor to set you up the first time making sure that they confirm that you maintain the proper leg angles so you don't damage your knee.  If the instructor can't or won't show you how to set your bike, LEAVE.  Notify the gym manager, and if they don't respond properly, move to a better gym.
  20. How do you do push ups and squats on the bike?
    You don't, or at least you shouldn't.  That's like asking how do you take a bath in your washing machine.  It's not the right place or tool for those exercises.
  21. How long does it take to get the hang of it?
    I generally tell participants you can love it the first time, but give it 3 tries before you decide it's not the exercise for you.  It's not for everyone, that's why we offer other classes.

  22. What's with all the shouting?

    That means the microphone isn't working.  Trust me, I don't like yelling it makes me have to work too hard to pedal and yell at the same time.
  23. How do you ride as a class?
    Follow what the instructor is leading you with.  If it hurts, don't do it and advise the instructor.  If you need a break, take one and rejoin the class when you're ready, just stay on the bike pedaling with a light resistance.
  24. But isn't indoor cycling more of an individual workout?
    It's an individualized effort in a group setting.

  25. How do I know which instructor is right for me?
    Talk with them and you'll learn what their level of knowledge and experience is.  Then it's down to personality style and music preference.
  26. How can I track my workouts?
    Get yourself a heart rate monitor or a fitness tracker.  I recommend heart rate monitors with a chest strap as they're the most accurate, but even a high end fit-bit will give you some information.
  27. Do I need special shoes?

    Nope.  Running shoes or cross trainers work fine, but if you decide you're going to stay with it I'd encourage you to get a pair of cycling shoes, unless your studio has them to borrow/rent.  You'll get a better work out with the cycling shoes as they'll let you use more of the pedal stroke. You're not just pushing the pedal down, now your pulling it up as well.
  28. What muscles are you training?
    Legs and glutes specifically.  You'll utilize your core and lower back for support and stabilization but you're not targeting these during a cycling workout.
  29. What's question #29?
    The source of this list actually skipped #29 in their counting; I didn't.
  30. Is injury common?
    Cycling is meant to be low impact so it shouldn't be abusing your body joints.  However there are some intervals that are harder efforts (sprints, tabata, etc...) that can push your cardio limits. There are also some bike positions that are more prone to injury and should be avoided.
  31. Should I stretch afterward?
    Absolutely and it will help prevent soreness.
  32. Aren't there cheaper forms of effective exercise?
    Sure, you can do push-ups, planks, running, etc... all at home without paying for a monthly gym membership.  Doesn't get any cheaper than that; but if the group setting motivates you to keep going, then invest in yourself and reap the rewards.
  33. Is indoor cycling worth the splurge?
    That question is up to you to answer.  

In closing: No one ever leaves my class with that perfect hair and make up that you see in the pictures used in the article.  They generally leave in a sweat drenched shirt and shorts, but with a smile on their face and a glow about them coming from a sense of accomplishment.

I'm also not knocking the article that was the source of this list, the author simply doesn't distinguish between indoor cycling programs like Spinning, Schwinn, Keiser, versus other "boutique" type programs like SoulCycle.  I simply felt that a deeper dive into answering the questions was warranted, but if the 5 word answers are enough to get someone off the couch and exercising then great!

Keep Spinning!  (or indoor cycling, just be safe). 

Friday, April 29, 2016

Indestructible (Race Day Spinning Profile & Playlist)

I went off the reservation for this months Race Day Energy Zone profile.  I usually take a real terrain profile for an actual race and use that to guide my profile; this month I simply went with what I was feeling physically and emotionally.

I've been training for a couple of triathlons, bigger than what I've done in the past, and while I'm not physically where I'd like to be, I'm in better shape than I've been in years.

I no longer fear that 1.2mile open water swim, and the bike was never really a concern; but no I'm imagining that I'll be able to also run the 13.1mile run, while not fast, but continuously.  All that to say, I'm feeling pretty good about where I am right now in my training.

Just a reminder before you look at the profile...Race Day parameters are a bit different than a typical interval ride.  Riders should expect to be at 80% MHR the entire time with a minimum cadence of 80rpm.  What this means is that your hills are not loaded quite as heavy so that you can maintain that 80rpm which is the top speed for a climb.


Saturday, January 23, 2016

Going Big Early (Spinning Profile & Playlist)

For my first interval ride of 2016 I really wanted to knock it out of the park and show the class participants how different interval can be from the strength and endurance rides we've been doing.

I've been staying in the EEZ / SEZ zones while the classes have been full of new folks with their resolutions.  Besides many of the other instructors hate EEZ and only begrudgingly do SEZ.

Last week I did a David Bowie Tribute ride, and since that occasion wasn't going to repeat, I decided not to post that play list.  This week finds me doing a Glenn Frey Tribute, but I liked the profile so much and since I didn't over do it with tribute songs here you go.

Also, if you haven't seen this hilarious video from Funny Or Die, you need to check it out.

Spotify users:  I substituted a different Tabata song in the play list since the one I used wasn't available.  The version I used actually had a 2 minute cool down that I used to perform a flat and and then start a small incline into the first mountain.


Sunday, January 10, 2016

Shut Up Already!

I love January time in the gym.  I know that for some "regulars" they hate the crowds of the New Years Resolutioners, but for me I love it.  They bring an energy to the gym, they're all so full of hope, even if they don't have the slightest clue how to attain their goals.

That's okay, that's what we're there for, to instruct, mentor and encourage these newbie's to a healthier, fitter version of themselves.

I will say I do enjoy people watching too.  It's amazing how much complete and utter nonsense you'll see and hear.  I was in working out last week, doing some bicep curls and watched a 20-something working on an elliptical machine going like a crazy mad person at a velocity that had she not been wearing a low friction fabric she might have ignited her own pants. Just down from little miss hot pants was another young woman that was "working" on a recumbent bike at maybe 10 RPM.  Later while I was running on a treadmill I watched people stroll and meander on the track that encircles the 2nd floor.  I know that some of those folks were going to go into school or work the next day and share with their colleagues about how their workout had gone and how long they were at the gym.  I'm sorry but if you're walking at a 2 MPH pace holding your phone and talking to someone (not exercising with you) then you shouldn't consider it a workout.

The entire thing reminds me of the YouTube video that's been floating around social media.  It's a fairly long video but well worth the time.

Which brings me to my recent classes.  My studio is a round room; I don't know what fool came up with the idea of a round room but regardless this is what I have to contend with.  The acoustics of a round room are bizarre and I find I hate standing in the middle of the room as you get a lot of weird echos (remember I get off the bike and coach a lot).

Back to the Newb's in class. They all come to class with their friends and find that they have to talk; not realizing that the acoustics make it so that everyone hears their hushed tones.  I'm not concerned about the occasional grunt, or a "Let's do it!" outburst of encouragement from a participant.  It's the long discussions about how they're feeling or doing during or after class.   This week I actually had someone taking pictures and tweeting during class.  
Historically I've imposed the "telepathy rule".  I'll remind everyone that as a courtesy to the class that I'm the only one that should be talking during class, but feel free to carry on any conversation that you like as long as you use mental telepathy.  I then remind people during class "remember mental telepathy."  That usually works.

If I'm coaching an interval session, where it's acceptable to go anaerobic I'll have the class keep adding until they just run out of capacity to pedal and talk at the same time.
This week during a strength ride however, I came up with one for someone that was particularly chatty.  We hit a down hill segment and I used the visual about the wind blowing in your face, and then I told everyone to shut their mouths so they didn't catch a bug.  I even went on a bit enough to tell them how bad the bug might taste.

Aside from the straight forward addressing the chatter, what creative ways have you addressed your Chatty Cathys and Talkative Toms?

Saturday, January 2, 2016

What if all Indoor Cycle Instructors actually rode a bike?

I originally wanted to title this post, 

"What if your indoor cycle instructor knew what the #$%@ they were doing?

but then decided that was a bit harsh.

Now let's be clear, I'm talking about indoor cycle instructors not that crazy stuff that you see on YouTube or a SoulCycle class.  If I were to write an article about that craziness, I'd title it, "What happens when your Zumba instructor does crystal-meth on a bike."

No insult intended to Zumba®.  I love Zumba and can totally recognize how awesome it is for the core.  If I had a lick of rhythm and grace I'd be a Zumba instructor.

What if all Indoor Cycle Instructors actually rode a bike?

...they would understand the importance of proper bike setup to prevent injury.  They wouldn't simply instruct you on the setup of the bike all from the comfort of their bike assuming that everyone already knows how to adjust the bike.  "Set your bike up so your comfortable" would fall 'way to "Let's make sure your setup properly and that you understand how this machine you're strapped to works."

...they would understand that it's impossible to climb doing a sprint while contracting your abs.  I'm blaming Pete McCall for this.  I saw a post by Pete on Facebook about why not to "engage the core" so of course karma being the sadistic witch she is, means that one of the first classes I attend they instruct directly the opposite of this sage advice.

...they would understand that there is no way to do a "sprint" for 90 seconds at 100% of your heart rate.
 I don't even know what to say here other than, "Have you actually used a heart rate monitor?"  and if you do, have you actually done some testing.  Even with the conservative formula that Polar throws into their calculation for max heart rate I would question the ability of anyone in the general population to work that hard.  Don't believe me?  Watch this Tour de France finish line video and notice that the Best of the Best take off for their final sprint at 1:56 a mere 16 seconds before crossing the finish line.  They know they can't sprint for 90 seconds, and they time their finish accordingly.  Yet we in the cycling studio's of the world sprint for 90 seconds?  I don't think so.

...they would understand that sometimes less is more.  It's a bike, strap your feet to the bike and start pedaling. It's not complicated.  You don't need to muddy it up with too many cues to give a semblance of knowing what you're doing.  Shut up already.  That goes for the cool down stretch as well.  Cuing a stretch with so many instructions as to sound like you're watching an origami video at double speed does nothing.  The instructions were coming at me so fast this morning that had I tried to understand them I would have folded myself into a pretzel.

...they wouldn't try to stretch the lower body while sitting on the bike.  It's okay to stretch the upper body, the shoulders, traps, and neck while on the bike (you can do that on a real bike too), but standing up, folding at the waist, so that your butt is pointed toward the ceiling while extending your arms and torso over the handle bars is a no-no.  Denise Druce (Master Instructor for Schwinn) has a nice video of stretches for after your ride, and she's a big advocate for yoga for cyclists.

...they wouldn't tell the participants that you just did 18-25 miles depending on your intensity. This is especially true if it's only a 45 minute class.  Even in a longer 55-60 minute format I wouldn't tell my class that we just went 18 miles unless it was a flat endurance energy zone ride and everyone was able to keep up with me.  Add a hill or two and we slowed way down.

These were the things that bothered me the last couple of days, but I'd love to hear from you all in the comments section about what insanity you see in the cycling studios of the world.

Hopefully next week I'll be able to give you a review of my new heart rate monitor / smart watch.

~ Spinning Freak™